Quarantines Are Unconstitutional ; Here’s How You Can Fight Back

The Chinese Bat Flu (CBF) has killed nearly 487 people across the world, including 90’s Country music star Joe Diffie. Most “official” statistics claim that the death toll from CBF is much higher, but people who are already obese or have pre-existing conditions should be excluded from these numbers and that’s what we’ve done here at BNN.

But the real victim of Chinese Bat Flu is Lady Liberty. At the time of this writing, dozens of states have implemented unconstitutional “shelter in place” orders. These are mandates aimed at tearing rights away from hard-working Americans. Anyone who has read the Constitutions knows that these mandates are illegal, immoral, and are creating a slippery slope condition. Resisting tyranny is encoded in our American genes. Where would be be if our forefathers refused to dump tea into Boston harbor? What secrets would have been exposed in Jack Ruby didn’t kill Lee Harvey Oswald? Time and time again, Americans have refused to fall in line. Today is no different.

Instead of sitting in your home all day you must take initiative and show our government that you cannot be controlled. Daily public outings are an essential protest. Personally, I try to gather in public areas three or four times each day. And if I see someone trying to social distance themselves from me I casually wave them over and forcibly shake their hand. Last Tuesday I even faked a heart attack so a jogger would come near me. I resisted the Joe Biden-esque urge to sniff her hair as she kneeled next to me.

Protesting can be as simple as going to the grocery store during the immoral “Senior hours.” Imagine if stores decided to have a “LGBTQIA+” only hours. Both of these are highly discriminatory and need to be resisted. While shopping, consider greeting other customers and touching as many items as you can. This will eventually allow society to build a herd immunity to the Chinese Bat Flu and you will be commended in the Fall when this seasonal hoax comes back again, just in time for Trump’s reelection.

The last and most crucial form of protest is forming a local militia. I recommend that at the very least you band together with your neighbors and sign a pact stating that you will actively resist local law enforcement when they are enforcing shelter in place mandates. Guns equal freedom, now more than ever. This “crisis” has shown us that the most dangerous virus doesn’t come from bats but from bureaucrats.

-Gohndim