Bastiat Reflects On 19 Months Of Failing At Dieting

Loyal Bastiat fans will recall that in February of 2020 the ineffable Rareest Pepper attempted to persuade Bastiat to commit to a healthier lifestyle. After reading a harrowing fanfic about giving up on ones fitness goals and dreams, Bastiat decided to buckle down and lose the gut. Pepper kindly reminded Bastiat that many poors live on less than 1000 calories per day so weight loss should be easy for anyone with a modicum of discipline.

The journey started off slowly, and Bastiat eventually hired a smoking hot personal trainer. They began early morning workout sessions, during which Bastiat only managed to doxx himself twice. Progress was occurring before Twitch chat’s eyes as can be seen below. Bastiat even admitted he was getting closer to being able to see his penis, long obstructed by his hairy gut.


“My body stay vicious
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness”
-Fergie

It appears once again that BNN’s reporting is 100% accurate. Bastiat’s relapse into overconsuming calories was evident long ago. His obsession with feeder content and paying one of his mods to gorge on $25 worth of Taco Bell in a private video stream should have gave it away. But as the streams became less frequent, it became hard to tell just how much weight he was gaining. Until the Nashville event.


I actually feel bad for this portly chap.

Perhaps sitting next to a thinner, but still fat, Vaush made Bastiat realize how bad it had become. Maybe some at the event commented on his rotund-ness. It could be that Bastiat could see it in the eyes of the audience. Something made him realize that the fanfic had come true. He had given up completely on his fitness journey. One of the hardest parts of being a streamer is that you need to filter out the SIMPs constantly complimenting you. Every once and again you need to look into the mirror of truth and see yourself for what you are, not what your most deluded fans see. BNN is extremely anti-obesity and we are sending Bastiat a $50 gift card to Planet Fitness. We will be monitoring his progress closely.

Gohndim

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